Redefining the many shades of motherhood with Victoria Ratliff, Mallikajaan and more

They are no sacrificial saints or warm fuzzy bears, they might not even be the poster child of "ideal motherhood"; they're simply mothers who mothered on their own terms.

We’ve grown up drawing pictures of moms as superheroes who, instead of wearing capes, wore aprons; they were selfless, soft, warm, fuzzy, sacrificing, and forever present. And that was the problem; this image left no room for the mess, the mistakes, the grey areas, or the parts of her that have nothing to do with motherhood yet everything to do with it. Because there’s no one kind of mother. Some don’t fit the mould and some don’t want to. Some are trying to keep up, some are just figuring it out as they go. 

Also Read: Bridgerton mamas and Indian mothers are more alike than we think!

Here's a list of a few who remind us what motherhood can look like when it doesn’t come in one shade! 

Victoria Ratliff – The White Lotus Season 3

She’s rude, arrogant, and absolutely out of touch. She pops pills and says whatever she wants. On the surface, she looks like she couldn’t care less about her kids. But she owns exactly who she is, which is strangely her power. Victoria isn’t interested in being warm or maternal. She’s proof that not every mother wants to or has to be nurturing to be a mother. She is raw, brutally honest, and contrary to popular belief, she does look out for her children.

Mallikajaan – Heeramandi

Mallikajaan wasn’t born cold; life made her that way. She’s seen love go wrong, people betray her and knows exactly what the world can do to young women. So when she tries to stop her daughter from following her heart, it’s not cruelty, it’s survival instinct. She may look like the villain in a love story but she’s just a mother trying to protect her child the only way she knows how.

Alex - Maid

Alex is tired. She’s running on empty, juggling a job, a kid, trauma, and a system that never gave her a break. But she keeps going not because she’s a saint, but because she has to; otherwise, the only choice is to live in a rotten society, and she wants more for her daughter and herself. Her version of motherhood is full of hustle, fear, and small wins. It’s never pretty but it’s honest.

Sheila - Dabba Cartel

She didn’t choose to be a mother but when she became one, she showed up, not with lullabies but with enough street smarts and grit to take the world whenever necessary. She’s the kind of woman who hides a smoking gun in the folds of her saree and outsmarts everyone in the room. She is ageing, and far from what people expect a mother to be, just like any other mother who is underestimated but is the only one who knows exactly what to do in a crisis, even if it is related to running a cartel! 

Blanca Evangelista - Pose

Blanca isn’t a mother in the traditional sense. She’s a Black trans woman who builds a family from scratch taking in homeless queer people in her own home as her own kids. They are discarded and not wanted by anyone, just like it was for her. She feeds, guides, loves, and makes them believe they belong. Her motherhood harbours a home that isn’t about blood; it’s about choice. And she chooses to care, fight, and lead with fierce love.

Renu - Paatal Lok 2

This season is filled with stories of mothers but Renu stands out because she already has a son so when a young boy is handed to her suddenly, she steps in even though she never meant to. At first, it’s awkward; she doesn’t want him there, but slowly, something shifts. He fills a quiet space in her life and she becomes someone he can count on. This is portrayed not with a dramatic transformation but as something so raw and honest where a child, whose shadow of motherhood was snatched away, finds it in Renu, if only for a while!

Sarah, Julia and Kristina - Parenthood

Sarah is a recently separated single mom with two teen kids, doing her best and second-guessing every move. Julia, a high-powered lawyer, is constantly made to feel guilty for not being around more for her young daughter. Kristina is the “perfect” mom who’s losing her sense of self while caring for a child with Asperger’s and a teen daughter. None of them knows what they are doing because no one has it figured out. But they show up, screw up, try again. 

Radhika and Suman - Raat Jawaan Hai

These two moms are modern in the most relatable way possible. They highlight the debate of whether going back to life as lived before kids is feasible or there is a new normal that exists. They get jealous when their kids find other role models, shine light on how annoyin it is when kids ruin your plans, including the ones that just might be about watching a movie in peace. But as much as they hate their kid, they still love them bits. They talk about the guilt, exhaustion, joy, and identity crisis that comes with parenting today with no filters and just the truth.

These are the different shades of mothers we don’t usually talk about! The sharp, complicated, flawed ones that are just as real as the ones we have romanticised so far. Maybe even more so! Here’s to those mothers who don’t have a clue about what they are doing and are still kicking ass by just being themselves! 

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