Navigating grief and loss - the Bridgerton way

We’re rarely taught how to live life, let alone how to grieve life lost. This is reflected in Bridgerton season 4 and two moments from part 2 particularly need to be discussed further.

Spoilers ahead: After losing John Kilmartin this season, Francesca busies herself with catering to others, making sure the biscuits are refilled, saying the proper thing to everyone who comes to pay their respects - she does everything she can to outrun how it's going to feel when she finally allows herself to grieve the loss of her husband. Believing that pretending to be normal will make her feel normal, she isolates herself from anyone who wants to mourn John's loss differently, including her sisters, John's cousin Michaela and her own mother.

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Also Read: Bridgerton season 4 part 2 review: Benedict and Sophie’s forbidden tale of romance hits the sweet spot again!

Having dealt with a loss like Francesca's, Violet Bridgerton shows up every step of the way, ready to be there for her daughter when she finally allows herself to grieve and fall apart. The scene where, Francesca finally reaches her tipping point during a conversation with her mother, touched a nerve for me. Because it’s only then that she discovers what she’s been too afraid to acknowledge - feeling insufficient over not being able to provide her late husband with a child, something she truly believes he wanted. Further into the scene, she talks about what's underneath this - a deeper loss over feeling truly alone now and not having something tangible to remember him by.

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When Michaela suggests a different way, the Scotland way, of grieving John's loss by hosting a small gathering to celebrate his life while reminiscing about fond memories, drinking and dancing to honor him, Francesca isn't able to fathom this given the proper manner in which she was raised. Having lost my grandparents on both sides, this scene really stood out for me. This concept of celebrating life lived instead of hosting a wake, putting on a show and being judged over how sombre or not you come across, is so alien even in our current reality; in fact, it's considered as disrespect.

Unlike Bridgerton, where everyone eventually comes together to celebrate John, we're too busy dictating how one should process loss, how long our grief should last for and what counts as mourning. For those of us who mourn differently, the norm and what's expected out of us feels performative. Besides, there's so much shame attached to coping in a different way especially one where we try to make ourselves feel better by getting a blow out or having our nails done. We all have our coping mechanisms and they don't take away from our grief; they simply make it easy for us to cope during a hard time. Michaela's suggestion was simply that - her coping mechanism and Bridgerton representing something so complex and profound with so much ease in this season makes me hope that our ton can see the merit in this too!

What else did Bridgerton season 4 part 2 leave you talking about? Tell us in the comments below!

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